San Francisco Bay Area
Tel: +1 (415).246.7883
Individual Therapy
Profound life changes are possible!
In my many years as a therapist, I have witnessed my clients find meaning, happiness and ease, as well as deeper intimacy in their relationships. Profound life changes are possible!
The main ingredient in therapy is emotion. Emotions are vital messengers that help us meet our needs for safety and survival so we can thrive. Most of us were raised not knowing our emotions, instead we have learned to shut them down or intensify them.
Our therapeutic relationship provides a safe haven for emotional explorations. With my guidance, you will identify your emotions, sometimes with words, other times by exploring body sensations or visual images or dreams. These emotions then serve as guideposts, helping you through uncertainty and difficult life events. Contact me below.
Therapeutic Modalities: My approach is largely informed by attachment theory and emotionally focused therapy (EFT). I also use mind-body approaches such as EMDR ( (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and mindfulness techniques to help clients find relief from anxiety and trauma.
Couples Therapy
Happy partnerships help us be more resilient in difficult times
Many people dream of transforming their relationship, hoping it will become a source of happiness and connection. This dream is so understandable! Happy partnerships help us fight off depression and anxiety, find peace with early traumas, and help us be resilient in difficult times.
I continue to discover how much our mental health is affected by our relationship with our partner. A person’s mood, confidence and optimism is robust when a relationship is strong and secure, and conversely, when that relationship is strained, it brings us down.
Many people struggle in their intimate relationships. Some of us didn’t get good modeling from our parents or caregivers. For others, early dating relationships ended abruptly without enough clarity. We get to adult marriages largely unprepared. As our relationship deepens, so do our responses to the frustrations of daily life. A small criticism or oversight leads to unbearable anger and disappointment. We start telling ourselves that we don’t matter to our partner, or that we always disappoint them. We might go through challenging times and cope differently from each other. A storm is created making it hard for a couple to see their way through to the easy fun times and intimate connection.
Many couples find therapy results in more good will, love and intimacy. Couples therapy can help you get a more fulfilling relationship and provide a safe forum where you can share your thoughts and feelings with each other and have discussions that help shift your anger, resolve difficult topics or make better decisions. Often sexual impasses soften and couples find a much more satisfying physical connection. Reach out to me for help.
Family Therapy
I strive to help families create safety and trust
I’ve worked with children and families for more than 25 years and I also spent over a decade teaching family therapy to new therapists. I strive to help families create safety and trust so they can share their underlying feelings, discuss issues and solve problems. Usually family sessions reveal that members have different needs and perspectives and I help families manage these differences in a way that makes them feel closer.
In a secure, happy family, members feel understood and supported by each other. There is comfort with leaning on each other, and room for independent striving. They can express gratitude or re-live the daily dramas of a child's day with a substitute teacher or a parent's challenging work presentation. Families are able to re-visit a rocky moment that occurred in the morning rush, and repair hurt feelings. In a happy family, parents can stay connected and respectful of each other, working together when they realize their child might need a different approach or more attention or supervision.
It is hard to have a happy family in these complex modern times. There is a deluge of work emails, cell phone interruptions, and challenging circumstances that make us constantly shift gears. Most families do not have enough structural support or social support, and parents are fatigued! I love to assist families find their way back to happiness or find it anew. I support each family member in exploring the underlying emotions and how that links to their behavioral patterns.
In families with young children, I can help translate what children are expressing in their play or behavior so parents can respond more congruently. Many families I work with have experienced a loss or challenging circumstances and members have had different coping styles. Family therapy provides a forum where they can talk about the loss or challenge and regain connection so the family feels like a safe haven for everyone. I can help, contact me below.
Trauma Therapy & EMDR
You can get past your past
Trauma is an experience that leaves us feeling scared, unsafe, unworthy, or responsible for a bad situation, even though logically we should be “over it.” You may spend a lot of time rehashing an early trauma, you may have phobias or overreact to certain experiences, or you may feel too paralyzed to move forward on some important life goals. Unprocessed trauma can propel you into making the same wrong choice again and again. Trauma can also result in creativity blocks and fears about trying new things.
Trauma can be big or small, recent, or from an earlier part of our life. The effects of trauma do not lift easily. Early childhood abuse or neglect are often a source of trauma, as are car accidents, life threatening illness, and experiences of loss or heartbreak. Sometimes childhood bullying, or difficult messages from unsupportive teachers are connected to current distress.
Research has shown that the body remembers, and many of the sensations and experiences of trauma are stored in a non-verbal part of the brain and cannot always be accessed through talk therapy.
EMDR Therapy (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can help with these deeply buried traumas. It is a highly effective process that uses "bi-lateral stimulation"- such as moving one's eyes back and forth, listening to audio tones with headphones, or mild tactile sensations from holding clickers in each hand.The bilateral stimulation can have a calming effect, often clients feel as if they are watching the past trauma through a train window. EMDR can also bring on strong emotions, which process through the mind-body quickly, resulting in clients feeling a lot of relief.
Clients report after EMDR treatment that they still remember the trauma, but it holds no strong emotional charge. Often they can truly integrate the idea that they couldn't have prevented abuse or bullying because they were young and powerless at that time. Other times a client reports a new feeling of safety because they have integrated the sense that the past dangers are in fact, in the past.
I'm a certified EMDR clinician and have been using this treatment modality since 2001. I'm continually amazed by the results. Reach out to me to see if you’d like to see if it could work for you.
Sexuality
Working on your sexuality will result in new energy, vitality and zest for life
People with great sex lives are confident. They know how to ask for what they want, they know how to give and receive, they know how to let physical connection be a bridge to emotional connection.
I am very passionate about helping individuals and couples with their sexuality. I have been focusing on sexuality within individual and couples therapy and run workshops too. Please contact me for more information on workshops.
Therapy for enhancing sexuality involves sex technique, communication skills and sex education. It involves finding creative ways to help you access deep awareness of your sexual desires. Therapy can help you address some of the difficulties in your sexual connection related to:
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Confusion: You know you want more pleasure, playfulness, adventure, sex in unusual ways or places but you don’t know how to make that happen.
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Life Stressors: You can’t relax and have sex because of work, kids, and chores.
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Relationship Tension: Irritation and anger blocks you from being turned on and you don’t even know if you even want each other anymore.
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Trauma: You can’t get over a painful betrayal or bad experiences from your past.
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New Circumstances: Finding your way back after a new baby, adjusting to an empty nest, or sex after divorce: how will that happen? Reach out to me for a consult.